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yes, well i'm back. how long this will last i have no clue

bad news has come my way, my grandma has been diagnosed with (idk if this is english or not) dementia. She collapsed one day and had to be brought to hospital, they did some tests and found that out. She had some tromboses over the last couple of years too.
My uncle has been crying like mad, and seeing my uncle cry....gods i can't even begin to tell you how long it's been (i'm guessing the last time he cried i was maybe 3 and he broke up with his bf). So seeing him cry like that....it was heart-breaking

there are some troubles with my granddad and other grandma (they are having the most difficult and ridiculous divorce ever)

i ahve stuff to do actually but i can't muster up the courage to begin....

BUT i'm gonna give some good news too: me, Aline and Anaïs(Aline's sister) are going to the tokio hotel concert 25th of February :) I'm buying Aline's ticket for her birthday (which is the 17th ^__^)

hmmm nothing else to mention really. PE has been fun (OMG did i just say FUN??? :o) even though we were running all the time, i was surprised and happy to know that i'm actually not that bad at running (ofcourse Mr.Boydens is awesome for finding us a decent ROAD to run on instead of those stupid laps which consist of running on uneven soil)

went to the Makro yesterday. Was pretty entertaining :3

Saw amazing Die pics and fell in love with him allover again XD

going to the dentist's the 18th (first time ever :O i've never had probs with my teeth so i never went, parents need to save enough money as it is) i'm going for a check-up though, nothing major XD just worried that she'll find something because i was too stupid to go to a dentist before.

i'm going to New Moon the 21st XD hope it'll be good, but seeing as the trailers look awesome, that will probably be the case XD

going off now

bye ^__^<3

Hello people :D it's been forever since i've updated (sort of spontaneous hiatus or smth happened, idk why XD) a major sorry for that!

I'm going to give a short version of my summer: July was awesome, had a sleepover with Lynn and Aline, went shopping twice and chilled a good deal :)
August was great too and my vacation-job thingy was a great way to discover that i can't do an 38-week (basically my feet hurt like hell after a few hours, so i can't walk in a decent pace and it keeps me from doing my job well enough...) so instead of 1029€, i have 629€ (i worked a 20-hour-week) . I met a guy who was into me but sadly i was not into him (really who starts texting saying how much you like someone after you've talked to them like twice? it creeped me out a litte in all honesty) and i had the greatest boss ever, Christoff, and we had a lot of fun doing silly things. Sad for him though that his life is so tough, his girlfriend has tumors around her skull and in her neck, and while i was working there her situation became very bad, i hope she's okay now though...
anyway, after August comes September XD School started out okay (even though i have some stupid teachers i reallly reallly didn't want to have but whatevs only one more year, right?) and me and Mercedes were united yet again, and have had some fun ever since XD
my birthday was cool too, got a necklace from Mercedes, money from Lynn and free-movietickets without an actual title from Aline. My uncle bought me a rune-sign (Luck) and the rest of my family gave me money, which is fine really :D

I'm not going to see my niece a lot since she has decided to permanently move to her dad's. I felt sad but my mom promised me that Kimberley was always welcome, and she would not stand in between my niece and i. Me and my niece aren't exactly that close (personality clash...) but i do care for her and want to know what's going on in her life. My aunt at first didn't agree but after yet another sister fight, my aunt decided she didn't care enough about her daughter anymore (long story short, my niece made her life living hell, therfor she wants nothing to do with her daughter anymore. Can't say i blame her, but Kimberley hasn't done anything to me in my life, so i still care, no matter what) to actually meddle.

Didn't go to London, and my uncle felt very sorry for me since he had a blast there. He didn't really take a lot of pictures but enough for me to have a taste of his wonderful trip... At first he didn't want to hurt my feelings and didn't mention the trip at all, but i thought that was just silly and asked him to tell me everything (at least i could enjoy imagining everything that took place :D)
Now i'm forced to do some work for French class, and i hate itttttttttttt!! Not because of the language XD it's just that this task is taking me longer than i like(mostly because i keep getting distracted XDD)

As for the rest, everything is fine. Miyu is fine too ^__^ just being her lazy but sometimes hyper-self :p

oh and i had the weirdest dream 2 nights ago. Subject? My maths-teacher from last year and my uncle WTF XD it was like total crack and i have absolutely NO idea why i dreamt it XD
( onto the weird-ass crack dream with lots of giggling XD )anyway, i probably should stop blabbering and start working, i want to finfish this fucker today.....

Know that i'm not dead! XD
bye bye ^__^<3

went on a trip to Breendonk and Middelheim. The trip was fun, but i caught a cold from Breendonk (old fortress-thing) and i still haven't gotten rid of it. I hope i will soon.

hmmm Mercedes is sick :\ i wish her a fast recovery, i miss her T_T

You know, i haven't told you either, but i'm starting to grow fond of Maxim and Gilles. I mean not as in the 'they're cute'-way, but as in 'i understand them a bit more and don't find them so annoying only a bit retarded at times'-way XD
Got a little closer to Anna as well :)
Have tickets for prom! :3 I don't think i'll have a lot of people with me, but what the heck, don't care about the numbers, just wanna have fun x)

had to read a weird book for French and it was HILARIOUS XDD It was one of those books, with 8 different stories. The books title 'La mort en 8 chiffres' or 'Death in 8 numbers'. Guess what? in each of those stories someone died in a horrible way XD but it was soo cliché (jealous guy trying to kill the husband, greedy family killing each other for some golden spoons[which appeared to be poison and killed the last remaineing heir XDDD], wives killing husbands because they have lovers and all that XD)

As for the rest, school is fine, grades are fine, people in general are fine, and friendly (summer-vibe all around x])

oh and i have yet to show you the awesome pic of me and cybergoth-girlie in Paris ^__^ well here it is:

( cut for big piccie )so, i think that's all. If i have more to tell i'll come back for sure XD

bye bye now ^__^<3

hello, here i am again XD after...i don't know *hasn't checked yet* a while XDD

exams were good really, essay went well too, eveything is as it should be :33 have some work now but am trying to finish (the novel XDD)

what have i been up to? i've been to PAris, wonderful Paris in France :))
i had an awesome time there, met a cybergoth and took a piccie(will upload sometime XD), saw a lot of things, the only downsides were my sore feet (they were killing meeee!!!!!), bad food (NEVER EVER EAT IN THE FLUNCH OR YOU WILL REGRET IT), and some people who acted annoying. But i met cool people, like Leah, Pauline and stuff. I never hung out with them but i did now and they were awesome in their own way. They didn't even laugh at me when we went to a cocktail bar and i took a soda (i really didn't know how i would react to alcohol so i didn't take a chance).
So uhh, verything's cool; saw the Eifelltower, been on it actually, saw the grand arc, been to a graffiti ecpo and stuff (saw a lot of museums too x))
been there for 4 days, stayed in a relatively nice hotel, and tasted French culture, and spoke French XD a few will know that this is what i long for in life: to travel and see the world from different angles, icluding my neighbouring countries XD

AND I AM GOING TO LONDON I SEPTEMBERRR!!!!! MY UNCLE IS TAKING ME TO FREYA ASWYNN AND I CANT WAIT BECAUSE ME PLUS MY UNCLE EQUALS AWESOMNESS AND FUN AND LAUGHING :DDDDDD and he's taking me to London's underground shopthingies, with gothclothing and all. We're going to be careful though, London at night isn't the safest place on earth....we're going to take a cab to our hotel at night. I'm thrilled, i honestly am :D he's the one that got me into Goth and just showed me different types of music (he's more into neo-folk and noise while i'm more of an industrial/metal person) but it's just that difference that makes being with him fun. He shows me bands i've never heard of, only so i can discover they're absolutely great (project pitchfork, death in june, Rose McDowall...). I know he isn't really into the bands i like but he never shows any disrespect towards them because he has been a Goth(complete with mowhawk and walking in graveyards at night) [but now he has normal looks since he's nearing 40 and doesn't feel the need to look special, his freaky days are over XD] and knows the value of appreciation and respect.

and i'm almost positively going to Emilie Autumn the 24th(am plotting with my goddad to take me >D), is anyone here coming too? would be awesome :3

anyway, going to watch Step Up now :)

bye bye

I had to think a bit on that one XD What would i ask my lovely cat Miyu...?
basically i only have a few:
1) I know you're horny, but keep the noise down thank you(especially at night, i can't sleep whenever i want to like you). You're not getting a lover, end of story.
2) Could you please try to stop biting everyone? it's cute sometimes but when you bite too hard we get angry because it hurts. This is not fun.
3) Are you happy and what could be improved?

that and i'd tell her how much i love her. I really wish animals could understand such things because i want her to know that i don't see her as a pet, i see her as a friend, someone to cuddle everyday(lol XD) and some sort of child x)
[/creepy, overprotective behaviour]

well happy V-day to the people who celebrate it this year! :)

Am i celebrating? not so much....Valentine's day sucks without a date, doesn't help that i saw new pics of Ruben yesterday(my msn convo with Lynn turned that way, stupid from me to even properly look at the pictures, but i did and he's so goddamn gorgeous that it feels wronger by the second for a person like me to long for someone like him. He definetely deserves better). He still makes my heart melt(with only a picture of him, mind you, to illustrate the Edward Cullen effect he has on me) and now....well now it just sucks, can't really explain what exactly it is that's so awful. Perhaps the fact that i know he's happy out there and i'm here...alone...without anyone to share this fantastic day with. Or maybe it's the realisation that such a person will never ever belong to me because of who i am, where i come from and how i look. He is in a higher social circle [little understatement, the guy is filthy rich and my parents can't even properly pay their bills in time], he is 100x more pleasant to hang out with than i am[you notice that quickly] and he looks like a friggin' model while i...well i won't even begin on that one. It's like getting stabbed with a big knife that has acid on it to make it worse.
that, ladies, is what V-day means to me. Pure punishment and torture. The blackest of all black days. The mother of depression. The creator of the negativity i'm currently suffering from.

my 16th valentine without a guy next to me, that has to be a guiness world record.

Now how have i been? good mostly :) Report was great :)

but i've been sick....well ntot exactly, but i have been home Thursday and yesterday. I'm suffering from my intestants[Sp? no frggin' idea and i'm too tired to give a flying F-]. The doc gave me meds, and the meds suck because they are little things that go in my mouth and i feel like i'm suffocating when i'm swallowing those things with water (for those who are interested, the med. is called colofiber)
going to school Monday, and i have a lot of catching up to do, have 2 tests that i ahve to make and then there's the work for this week....at least my week will be short, i'm going on a relationship-day Tuesday, so that's 1 day less school, and then i think we're going to Urania[never heard of it, have no idea WTF it is] for geography

then after this week i have a week off, and godfuckingdammit will that feel good! the 25th i'll be on Aline's birthdayparty :3

okay i'll go to bed now, have a lot to do tomorrow(studfy for tests and stuff....yep)
goodbye people :)

*clears throat* hi there people XD sorry i took this long XD almost 2 weeks, that has to be my record or smth xD; anyway

life has been busy but fun :DD

main reason for my absense though wasn't school, but the twilight series XDD i downloaded all 4 books (haven't dled midnight sun since it isn't finished XD) and have read the last 2 in one go, so that took a while + homework + chores...yeah you get the point x)
i absolutely love the series, i know i sound fangirly and i probably am, but seriously the story is so sweet, and funny (Bella tries to hit Jacob at one point and breaks her hand while doing so XDD) and so...i don't know, interesting i guess :) it makes me wonder if there are any guys out there like that, would be really awesome x)
i've been reading a lot of critics on the books, so i can see why people don't like it and i admit some people do make a point. Like the overly teenag-y spirit and the overly clumsy Bella and overprotective Edward and stuff, but yeah i still like it anyway
i think the main reason why guys hate it though isn't because of the writingstyle or the plot. It's because they're 'irritated and baffled that girls across the globe swoon over a guy who doesn't want to have sex because he's afraid of hurting his girlfriend, is overly polite and generally too gentleman-like for the dudes in this world etc...actually i have this theory that guys hate any dude (fictional or not) that their girlfriend, or any other girl, swoons over, especially when those dudes are polite and sweet, and romantic and stuff....some men can be so insensitive when it comes to that,some people simply don't acknoweldge any other desire than sexual attraction, tsk tsk tsk XD

annnyyywayyy what has been going on here you ask? well, not much XD
my seminar is awesome and my ex-crush actually sits next to me. We've already done an 'assignment' together(not really, we all had to create a dialog and than we were divided in pairs and then we had to choose a dialoge and 'perform' the dialoge XD). I had forgotten that he was such a sweetheart, the reason i once fell in love with him. He's always smiling, never drops irritating comments, and just simply acts NORMAL around me :D you may think that's not a reason to fall in love but for a girl like me guys like that are rare. Most of them are sarcastic and avoid me like i have a disease or smth. Guys are never nice to me, unless they need something like paper or answers to some assignment or whatever, but they are never ever sweet to me for anything else. Hence the big heartflutter when a guy decides to be nice. I only know 2 guys that behave normally around me in my school, first being Jonas , the ex-crush and i almost forgot Jorgo, but i don't see him anymore, he used to be friends with Yana, and sort of friends with me but since he changed schools i don't see him anymoreXD and the 2nd to 3d (if you count Jorgo he's the 3d but i don't XD)being Michaël, a guy from my class. He isn't really my type, so i'm not having a crush on him, but i can't get over the fact how nomal he is towards me, it really feels good to have MALE species sitting next to me without me feeling the need to punch their faces in for being so rude to me or for just being annoying, bossy people who abuse my brain.
outside school my neigbors are nice too, but that's because we grew up together as kids and have adjusted to each other. Igor is the one i talk to the most, he lives next door. He's like 2 years younger, but he's pretty sweet, and was actually looking at me when i went to the prom(staring is more a more appropriate word, since he never saw me all dressed up and made up before, i never do that XD). I'd never witnessed a boy looking at me with that expression before and when he did, it was so cute, not to mention that it boosted my ego :3
we have Andy too but i don't see him much and we don't really talk much. There's Faïk, a turkish dude i think, well something among those lines, don't care anyway XD we played house once when we were little :3 and actually all i remember from that day is that his eyes were clear-blue, like Gackt when he has his lenses on. I remember staring at those eyes and just being mesmerised by them, because the sun made the eyes even more clear and i was all like "woww, prettyyy" XD yeah, but now he has become an ass XD
Aside those, i never had any male attention and that screws a girl's confidence up, you know xD;

okay enough stories of the past XD back to what i was typing about, my seminar. The class is pretty awesome, we get to do funny stuff, and it's perfect for me since i love writing stories and imagining things and writing them down :)
we have a new maths teacher, but he explains things so differently that almost nobody can follow. I, more or less, can but it takes a little practice to understand what he's saying XD
PE was awesome too, we're ropeskipping this month and i love ropeskipping :D it is difficult though but yeah, practice makes perfect XD i hope i get some good grades, that would be great, but i'm not counting on it XD

hmm what else to say, Monday is Mercedes' b-day, and i'm going to huggle her to death XD she knew i wasn't able of buying stuff, so i'll print smth from the i-net instead, at least she has something that way otherwise i feel like a jerk XD

ah and i probably haven't told you about my pc dying either. Well my A-open pc is dead, and now i have a medion one, it's black/grey and pretty, but slow x_x the motherboard in my A-open was slowly dying so we just ended the whole thing before a disaster happened heh
my harddisc is saved though, so i still have all my files and pictures and stuff, thank goodness for that XD

you're probably wondering why i'm still up this late (it's 1.42 A.M here XD) and the reason is pretty simple: my parents had to attend a New Years event on my dad's job XD karaoke and stuff included XD i think they're having major fun since they've been gone since like 8.00 PM XD
My uncle was here today, had to do shome shopping for my grandma and i had to help with getting the groceries in the elevator, and then he came to my house and cut my parent's hair. He made curls in my mom's hair, to make her like a princess :3 (he was here anyway, so he saw no problem in swiftly fixing my mom's hair) then he cut mine a bit, just the endings though, i don't want anything else done to my hair right now. I don't like fringes, i had them in the past and they were anooying XD so i'll keep my boring haircut XD it's easy to maintain XDD my uncle left around 9 PM and now i'm home alone >D i already chatted with Lynn to ctach up on everything (been absent for 13 from them too XD i've been very anti-social lately, sorry! XD) and now i'm updating this ^__^

i've been tempted to watch a movie but since i don't know when they'll be back i don't really know if it's such a good idea XD because when my parents arrive, i'll be like obligated to stop watching DVDs and to sleep....

hmm, i think i'll do some homework Xd have to do a lot still, haven't done crap today XDD
bye bye ^__^<3

First of all: THANK YOU  fonulyn AND slowdead  FOR THE XMAS CARDS!! :DDD they were lovely, and i'll be certain to send one back!
second:
Saw Twilight yesterday, and i absolutely loooovvvveeedddd the movie :3
actually i can't see the reason people hate it so much. I think some people forget that vampires have been humans too and some guys just want ANY vampire movie to go like "arrr IM A VAMPIRE AND IMMA BITE YOOOOO111!!!"...i think Edward was hot x) Aline was a James-fangirl and Jacob-fangirl though, and Lynn...i don't think Lynn had a preference, she disliked them all XD i think Jacob is cute, but Edward is better, sorry! XD Bella is Edward's and nobody elses! xD I'm very glad i saw it finally, and as soon as it comes out on DVD i'll make my parents buy it XDD
i know, it's not an 'intelligent' movie, it's meant for teenagers with love for vampires and thus full with hotness and lovetalk and "ANGST", but i think some haven't understood this yet X)
oh and i think Bella & Edward should've gone far more further than mere kissing (they were so close to just giving in, but then stuff happened *isn't gonna spoil the movie*)
The dad+rifle+Bella telling she's with Ed-thing was goddamn funny XD daddy wasn't really happy, was he? XD
and the whole story in general was very exciting :) because of the trailer i was a bit mislead on when certain lines or certain situations were going to appear, but i ended up loving every single minute of that film and looking on wikipedia to spoil any event that will happen in the other books *slaps self* god, i just couldn't hold back...now there are no more real surprises XD;

aannyyyywaayyy before we went to the movies, we went to the shoppingmall, but not to buy clothing or anything, to eat our sandwiches in peace XD otherwise we had to stand in the cold and we didn't want to do that LOL
i got a little plastic ducky from Lynn Xd Aline got one too XDD
i've had soooo much fun yesterday, i had forgotten again how much i laugh when i'm with them. I thought they had changed for the worse when they changed schools. Lynn looked more like a lady on most pictures. That may sound mean, but not when i'm talking about Lynn. Lynn is a bit of a tomboy, she cares about clothes but doesn't stand hours in the mirror to get herself ready. She's the sporty girl with love for comfortable clothing and hates pink clothing à la Legally Blonde (really if she EVER wears that kind of clothes, i'm going to laugh at her 'till i faint XDD) and so you can't expect her to change into Paris Hilton overnight. But there was this one picture i saw that made me doubt if she really hadn't changed. I was scared of losing her and Aline like i lost Yana for a while. I don't like people changing who they are because it's not "cool" or whatever, but it looked exactly like that in my paranoid mind.
Luckily, i have nothing to worry about and Lynn is just herself as she always was, that made me verry verrryyy happy :D

Right, exams: didn't really go that well, but i hope that's just my paranoid, pessimistic self speaking XD i know that when i say it's gonna suck, i mostly end up having 60% or more, but still, i can't help but feel like the results are not gonna be high enough to my liking. I've heard that my niece has very good examgrades, and ofcourse i'm happy for her, but it puts more pressure on me. I've always been the better one when it came to school, and i fear that when that changes, my mom's behaviour towards me will change as well. I'm scared that she will end up being angry at me for not being good enough, i'm scared that she will change into this evil person who will force hours and hours of extra schoolwork on me in order to have better grades again. And don't think i'm overreacting, my mom is a verry stubborn person, and when she says she'll do something, she actually does it (except for killing people, because that's illegal XD)
buttt i will not overreact today ^__^ today i'm going to lay back and do almost nothing (have to do some little chores but that's allright :D) and i'm certainly not going to stress about my grades, which i will get tomorrow any(have to go to school to pick up my report..*crosses fingers*)

i guess i'm done now XDD i'm gonna get my butt moving and get to the little chores now :)
byer bye dearies ^__^<3 and think of me tomorrow around 2.30PM my time XDD

so i've decided that i will someday buy myself the Twilight book series, BUT in English and when the price has gone down. I don't think i'd like it much in Dutch. It has to do with the fact that English is a language that can express much more feelings with little words, and the fact that i prefer reading the original story, translations always have to find some alternative words if a word or a sentence can't be litterarly translated. I'm going to see the movie the 17th december, but a lot of people (aka aline and Mercedes XD) have recommended to read it :)

annnyyywaayyyy i have this lovely desktopwallpaper with a pic of Edward cullen, and a quote from the book

"And so the lion fell in love with the lamb" he murmured.
I looked away, hiding my eyes as i thrilled to the words

"What a stupid lamb" i sighed

"what a sick and masochistic lion"


best quote ever really :)

hmmm nit much to say, i'm busy with revising and stuff so i'm not much on lj Xd but that will change soon :D i promise

have to go now
bye bye :)

The first snow has been falling here ! :DDD

i'm so happy, last year it only started to snow around February, and now loooooooookkkkkkk!!!!! :DDDDDDDD




( three more of these :D )Miyu, however, hates snow apparently, she meows constantly when she's sitting by the window XDD it's kind of hilarious to watch her complain about the white stuff being there XDDD

Speaking of Miyu, i'm trying to get her get used to a leach :) i've read on the i-net how to get her used to it being around and how to deal with it further, and i'm following it like crazy (i want to be able to walk my cat like i would walk a dog ^_^)
i'm also trying to find a way to prevent her from ruining our christmas tree, which will be set up right after the 6th of December (it's Saint-Nicholas then :3)
She's been behaving well lately (except for the occasional playful agression, but i can cope with that XD), she's such an adorable creature :33

anyway, gotta shower, i guess i'll update further tonight x)

hmm it's been a while XDD i had a lot to do, still have to do some things ^_^; exms are coming up so, it's time to finish the big tasks i had gotten begin this year.
i'm very damn tired right now, and i would love to sleep for 2 days in a row XD i've been working a bit when i was supposed to sleep (but not on my computer, i had to read a lot, and take notes and stuff XD) and now i feel like a trainwreck x_X but yeah, i'll survive. I haven't checked lj in a while, i just don't have the time for it anymore and i'm deadtired by the time i actually get home XD

but now i'll make up for it a bit :)

everything's been fine here, got my examshedule and i doesn't look so bad to be honst. I've had worse.
the 15th was my mom's b-day, we had a lovely dinner and laughed a lot , was fun :3

Lynn has called my a couple of days ago, she was going to some theaterplay for school with her whole class and just wanted to call me to hear how things have been going and such :D we LOLLED wo much XDD and i made friends with people i haven't even seen yet XD WTF these girls in Lynn nad Aline's class are so funny and yet so weird Xd they're sponateous you know? the type of girls that shout 'we miss you!' to the cellphone even though they don't know who the hell you are XDD

generally everyone has been relatively sweet to me :DD i mean Annelies and Julie actually NEED me, it's kind of sadistically funny >D they need so much from me, notes, summaries and crap. I give them those because, let's be realistic, it won't do shit to their results, they're failing anyway >DDD

Miyu has been lovely too ^__^ she's very cuddly at times, at those moments she keeps on snuggling up to me, to the extend that i (even though i don't want to) have to get her out of my room because i can't do my work otherwise XD;

hmmm yeah i think that's kind of it. School's fine, life's fine, everything's fine XDDD

feeling a bit better now, sorry for the last post, i was feeling lonely and needed to vent somewhere. Everyone was away, having a good time and yeah...i felt a bit left out, but yeah done things can't be changed

went to my aunt today, and had a bit of fun, my family can be so damn weird sometimes XD

it's school tomorrow, needless to tell you i don't feel like going really, having PE the first 2 hours of the morning X_X and we're going squashing (hope i wrote it right XD). I hope it all turns out well, i'm not exactly fond of fast squashballs heading my way, and me having to hit the ball XD eye-hand coordination = NOT good XDD

as for the rest, i'm waiting for my exams, at least in that period i only have to do that....hehe

going to study religion now, have a test tomorrow (don't ask XD)

sleep well ^__^<3

This is the most sucky halloween EVER

i know my parents hate it but my mom couldn't be worse today and OFCOURSE everybody else is having fun somewhere while i'm stuck at home doing fucking NOTHING, and trying to bring myself in halloween-spirit, but it's not working because i already have to go to bed

thanks mom, really, going to be around 11 PM and being a whiney woman (even though i almost cleaned the whole house because you wouldn't have to, but it's okay, don't count that, it's just me who did it)

it's my favourite holiday and how's my situation?
let's check
-alone
-pissed off
-to bed early because mom's not 'feeling so well'
-NOT having fun

Happy motherfucking halloween, may people scare you to death, no wait, may people scare me to death, that'll be better

okay so i'm finally done uploading all my pictures XDD
took a while, since a took a shitload of pictures, too bad they're all kinda tiny though, but my camera wasn't working so i had to do it with my webcam x)

ready? set? go!


yeah don't ask why the hell i was looking pissed off, i had probs with my camera and wasn't over it yet XDD

and i also took out my black wig, which was much easier to put on than the first one Xd and so much lighter to wear XDD and for once i look decent in a picture! xD

now for the rest of them, follow the cut!

( UNDER HERE ARE 24 PICS OF MOI TO LAUGH AT CLICK IT SUCKA )

another week has passed and another few tasks have been done...well few, let's say a fucking lot of tasks XD

i have a week vacation now, and i have to read like 3 books, for French, Dutch and English. Oh well, i'll manage i guess ^_^

i came here to say i'm sorry for lack of presence here xD; i'm probably going to write more in my lj since my uncle can't go out this week(he has some kind of exams, i think they're called mid-terms..) :\ this sucks because i was truly looking forward to going to a GOOD party

buuttttt because of that i'll be taking pics of my wig today :DD (am working on my clothing a bit, don't want to look stupid on a picture XD) the only thing i don't have are matching shoes XD and so i'm not photographing my feet XP

oh and before i forget, anyone got great ideas for halloween? i want to do smth but yeah....don't know what to do basically XDD

pfffff i'm boorrreeeeddddddd

time to go and make some pics of myself x)

prepare for the shoot of d00m XD

This day was AWESOME :D
Lynn, Aline and Yana came over today :3 (normally Yana wasn't coming, because she was going to some festival in Puurs, but turned out she had been wrong about the dateXD so she came over :)
we had like lots and lots of fun ^__^ we first ate icecake(i think that's the term XD) and started just chatting and stuff, laughing and teasing each other, then i pulled out my wig XDD and put it on everyones head XDDD and made pics of it (will post them tomorrow, i hope XD)
thenn we played Buzz hollywood quiz x) i ended up being 2nd xD which isn't bad lol
then we played Topstars, which is some kind of game where you have to guess what celebrity you are and stuff XD i ended up 2nd there as well xP i had Eminem on my head, and stupid me couldn't figure that one out XDD
after that it was time to each sandwiches, and then after that Aline had to leave...but Yana, Lynn and me talked some more, until Yana had to leave as well, and i was alone with Lynn XD her parents were picking her up around 9 PM, so we had like an hour orso left :D Lynn took out my guitar and started playing, well if you can call it playing XD more like making noise on it XD i pulled out my tam-tam, and we started making nois like babies XDDD
we looked at some pictures from the prom XD apparently the school had made some pics of their own, and i hadn't seen them yet, me and Lynn have LOLLED XD

and since Lynn was thirsty we went downstairs again, talking some more, and before i knew it she had to go as well :)

i had a lot of money O_O it's good though xD but it was more then i had expected, and honestly it makes me so grateful that i want to hug my 3 friends to death right now :3
i'm already looking forward to my next party(next week, because my relatives are coming :DD)

this was the 2nd best birthdayparty ever :DDD (best one was when me, Yana, my mom, and Yana's mom went to the city on my birthday, because there were fireworks that day for some special reason XD and we ended up going to the graslei (riverside where there are little cafés :3) and staying there 'till like 1.30 AM or something XD and meanwhile me and Yana were having fun with some drunk people who stated some little ant-sculptures were theirs XDD. That one cannot be topped, unless i get a party like in 'My supersweet 16' XDDD *soooo not happening*)

i'm almost going to bed, i'm fairly tired, and my uncle is visiting me tomorrow, to help me with something x)

good night ^___^<3

ok i'll give a quick update on my life XD

it's going better, my parents are fighting that much anymore, they still fight though...

oh and my dad just admitted like the day before yesterday that he likes Die's and Shinya's lips XDDDD i was lolling so bad when i went to sleep XD seriously, i think my dad is going to turn gay for Die and Shinya XDDD

hmm as for the rest, tomorrow i'm getting my books XD and i think i'll try to buy Lynn's birthdaygift Thursday x)

anyway summary: life is gradually becoming happier^^ (except for the 500€ my mom has to pay for one lousy paper, but i'll explain that one later)

last thing before i go: i think i heard my mom say she liked the way the peeps of the VK-band versailles looked O_O i think i finally managed to make my parents like Jrock and VK i'm manipulative XDDD

hmm more tomorrow, am going to bed nao ^__^<3

To me love is something you can't describe in words. It's thinking of that one person, and immediatly getting a smile on your face, even though everybody else is in a foul mood.
It's knowing deep down that you'll always care for that person wheter said person loves you back or not.
it's seeing that one person, and get swept off your feet, each and every time.
love is a blessing and a curse at the same time. it can make you feel like your in heaven, and yet it can make you wish you didn't own a heart.
love is a game, and you either win it or lose it.
love is a story with an unknown ending and course.
To me love is looking at someone and realising that if he ever needed help, i'd be the first one to volunteer, no matter what cost, no matter what his feelings are towards me. I love him, to the extent that i cannot think of anything i wouldn't do for him (except for illegal stuff XDD)
Love to me is hearing that soft voice, and feeling my heart beat faster and faster, feeling how i lose myself in my thoughts and dreams, feeling what his presence does to me inside.
Love is knowing you can't have the person, and yet are willing to give up your soul, if it means he wouldn't be harmed.
or like the singer from the Verve said it: love is noise

Love is confusing, troubling and messes with your mind until all you can think of is a certain name, and three words that are used too much.
Love is that one song you sing out loud, because the lyrics mean so much to you, it hurts you inside.

i think i met the emotion love once xD only problem was that i was the only one feeling that certain emotion XD

 ok i'll give the short version since lj is being a bitch on top of my problems

found out today that my dad is a complete asshole, he used to steal money from my moms account so he could buy himself useless crap. He doesn't know when to shut up on his job, which resulted in the position he's in now: without one. He may be able to get a job at the shop he works in now, i'm praying literally that he can keep this one and keeps his mouth shut when nobody asked his opinion.

i cried today. My mom told me she regrets marrying my dad, regrets choosing him as my father. the only thing she doesn't regret is me. any idea how it hurts when your own mom tells you your father is a worthless jerk, only interested in computers and money? it hurts a lot. I cried in front of my mom, i couldn't hide it how much i was shocked and hurt

only nice moment today was hugging my cat, she's a sweetheart.

Lynn is sick, and i hope she gets better soon

and i listened to Imogen Heap's hide and seek while reading the new fic from rabenhorst and got tears in my eyes. Ironically enough it suited my mood.

there are other problems with the family but i'll spare you those.

and then people wonder why teenagers kill themselves, saying this world is too much for them to handle....